How to “Seduce” Your Buyers With Passion Techniques

in Sales Vocabulary

I find sales training in everyday situations. The entire world is my lab. You can too–if you look for them.

In reading an older issue of Men’s Health magazine, there’s a great example right there on page 88. The article is “Woo Her With Words–Say It With Seduction Using This Passion-Packed Phrase Book.”


Well, it’s not an actual book, it’s an infographic. I’ve posted it for you here. Before giving examples, the lead-in teases,

“Words, wielded wisely, can be a powerful instrument of seduction. The key, however, is making your inferences subtle. Consider the five make-or-break romantic situations below.”

I”m taking each of their romantic scenarios–except one–changing them into sales situations more appropriate for this newsletter, and then paraphrasing their rationale as to why they work.
(Again, you can see the original graphic I’ve posted from the magazine here.

The Situation: You’re asking for an appointment for a face-to-face meeting.
Don’t Say: “Want to get together on Thursday?”
Try: “Want to get together so I can show you exactly how this system would cut down on the duplicate tasks you are now performing in your shipping process?”

Why it Works: Eve Mark, author of Flirtspeak, says that unlike a “blank proposal,” a question like this puts the listener in the moment, and creates an experience he or she can visualize.

Agreed. It is always easier for someone to say yes to the potential value they might experience, as opposed to the simple act of “getting together,” which they instead might associate with wasting time.

The Situation: You want the prospect to do an online demo.
Don’t Say: “Let’s go through an online demo.”
Try: “Let’s go through an online demo because it will show you precisely how the software will integrate with your existing process.”
Why it Works: The magic is in the “because.” Dr. Kevin Hogan, author of Irresistible Attraction, says “People comply 66% more often when they hear a phrase with ‘because’ in it.”
This is the same principle at work when we do Social Engineering, which is asking questions of people other than the decision maker in order to gather sales intelligence. We call it the “justification statement.”

For example, let’s say you reach an admin in the buyer’s department, after identifying yourself and company you’d say,

“I’m going to be speaking with Ms. Bigg, and I want to be sure that what I’ll be discussing would be relevant. I’d appreciate your help with a few questions.”

Or, “I’m going to be calling Mr. Byer  and want to be certain that what we have would be of interest to him. There’s some information you could help me with…”

The Situation: You want the prospect to move forward with the sale.
Don’t Say: “I want you to move forward with the order.”
Try: “Can you imagine how many more qualified prospects this program will generate for your sales reps?”
Why it Works: Reframing your desire as a question (especially one with a benefit) forces him/her to think about it, says Dr. Hogan. “The sensory word ‘imagine’ reinforces the visual picture.”

The Situation: You want a customer to upgrade to a higher-priced premium option.
Don’t Say: “Does the Premium Option interest you?”
Try: “Let’s try the option where you get the highest level of support and free updates that others have to pay for.”
Why it Works: Words like “try” and “maybe” give the listener a chance to say yes without feeling pressured, says Dr. Narissa Carter, a communications professor at Texas Tech University.

OK, there was one more example in the article, that, unless you sell food, I couldn’t come up with an appropriate sales example. It involved the word “taste.” Check out the infographic from the magazine and let me know if you can develop one.


These are all great suggestions. To really get the most out of this, I recommend taking a pen and paper and examine each situation. Then adapt them to your own sales scenarios. Or life scenarios for that matter.
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{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

Geoff Wiebe June 5, 2014 at 11:14 am

How about this Art…

The situation: You want the prospect to eventually move ahead with the sale, via an introductory initial service period which will close the deal for you.

Don’t say: Want to do business with us?

Try: I would like to offer you a “taste” of our program so you can see for yourself how perfectly we fit together. After you get a good feel with what my company can do to improve upon your current program, you will then know if it is the right fit for you (this would be much easier for me to deliver to a female prospect).

Why it works: Taste is sexy, says Marx. “She could be thinking how you might taste each other later.” Other triggers: “bite,” “juicy,” and “tender.” And never offer her a spoonful of ice cream, only a lick. (This doesn’t really apply at all). Actually, I would say it works in this arena because it is easy light language and a non-threatening approach with an “out” if they don’t like it (not locked-in, more comfortable, more choices).


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